image: Shinjan Patra
words: Debarati Ray
If you`re considering yourself as one of those hopeless being, surviving in this world where no one is accepting you for who you are and only making you feel that you`re in this world only to lead your life as some lonely wanderers, alone and helpless, let me tell you that here, in this blog I`m not going to criticize those persons who are making you feel that you`re not worthy enough to be with anyone or pushing you towards that dark territory of loneliness. Instead, here my purpose is to make you feel that you may be lonely at some phases of your life when time may come and go to make you feel that your existence is nothing but only a confinement amidst some unavoidable circumstances. But never lose your faith on that very moment, rather try to feel what exactly that circumstance is trying to tell you. If you pay heed to that, you may hear a gentle voice, whispering; “You`re not alone, my dear! Get prepared yourself for another go! For another mission where you need not to feel, you`re just helpless and alone!”
Being in solitude is another way to expand your consciousness:
During the time of loneliness you may feel you`re the most hopeless one around the world. You`re finding no one to converse with, no one to feel for you. You`re nothing but only an inessential earthly body who has no ground to sustain in this world. This loneliness may haunt you, every now and then. You may also experience some existential crisis, within. Sometimes your survival self may grieve over that loneliness, ask you in a fit of desperation, “Is this the ideal way, we ever promised to live?” But if you pause for a while, allowing your inner self to perceive, you may feel the presence of a resting dove, within. Then loneliness may not appear before you as a confinement, but as some blessings in disguise to reinterpret yourself in a newer way, to rediscover an eternal truth that this loneliness is trying to permeate in spite of all the oddities and crisis, around you. And on that very moment, you may also feel some gentle whispers, coming from the depth of your being. You may startle for once, may not find any one around the corner. But you can feel someone`s gentle presence, within, inspiring you to move forward, whispering into your ears, “The wind may be rough/ so as the path/ you stumble at every moment/ I know, you`re stuck/ but have you ever felt/ where is this solitude, guiding you to halt?”
You may feel rejected, abandoned, just like a wounded warrior, waiting over that deracinated island of loneliness but if you probe deeper into your being you may feel an enigmatic presence of something higher that only this loneliness has brought before you. When you`re feeling lonely under the dark blue sky, of some grieving night, try to feel the wilderness of that night, her calmness and her enigmatic presence that she brings with her. On a very first place, you may not perceive anything special. But if you pause for a while to feel that calmness, you may perceive that her wilderness has a message in itself, the message of an inherent truth of our existence. The truth that uncovers the mystery of our loneliness. It not only allows our consciousness to expand its horizon on a different realm, but also allows our being to feel that this dark night is nothing but only a period of restoration, of healing our wounds and preparing ourselves for a better tomorrow, for a newer dawn. Here, the nightly silence is not be felt as something of despair, but as something of higher wisdom that gently comes with her tiny steps only to make you feel that you`re not alone, but you`re here on this planet to explore the depth of your being, to reinterpret something higher that you`ve not found yet, while roaming around those extra crowded streets.
When loneliness empowers you to keep alive your faithful imagination:
I feel loneliness is nothing, but an opportunity from the divine to center your being and explore that inner seed, flourishing within, since the primordial time of your existence. And this will always make you feel to believe that there has always been a divine intelligence by your side to protect you, to make you feel that your existence is very much precious and eternally connected to the universe. So how can you be so lonely, while the entire universe is by your side?
And this exactly happened to that lonely woman of our surroundings who never allowed herself to believe that she was going through any crisis. Instead, she used to write mails at every night before her sleep and send those at her own mail box. Do you want to know what those mails were about? Those were some simple `thank you` messages to her soul mate that she used to drop at her own mail box. Though on a very first place it also seemed to us, a bit surprising when she herself told us about this extraordinary habit of mailing herself at every single night. But few months later, we discovered the actual mystery, hidden in it. Though on an apparent level it may seem to you as only some messages of love and affections, written for her loved one. But do you know who was that loved one for her? If you probe deep into the matter, you may perceive that her soul mate was no one, but someone very special who had always been with her, since eternity, listening to her every words, reading her every mails, downloading every details and mailing her back in order to make her feel, she is not alone. You may say that this was just an imagination of her mind. But I would rather interpret it as a faithful imagination of her heart. An imagination that was coming from the depth of her being. And there, this faithful imagination was enough for her not only to sustain but to live with her true mate and believe on that divine magic, surrounding the universe. And that was that ideal magic that always foretells us the truth of our existence. The truth where we can never feel alone, rather feel it as a blessing in disguise to evolve in a newer way, quite like that lonely woman for whom the period of loneliness came as a phase of self- reflection, not to brood over her sorrows, but a period of rejuvenation to restore her inner balance, to feel the depth of her being in spite of that darkness and to rise up once again like the phoenix from the ashes!
When loneliness helps you to heal and enlighten yourself in a different way:
Those of you are thinking that this lady must be someone very selfish and that`s why fate had played her own tricks with her, leaving her lonely forever only with her own laptop and mail box to chat with. Let me assure you that the reality was not something like that, but rather more tragic to be healed and overcome by someone else. And that process of writing something, opening her mail account and sending those to her own, was nothing, but quite like a painkiller for her to heal those wounds of her loneliness, she was going through during that tough period. It not only made her to feel that she was not alone, but also helped her to perceive the greater truth of her existence; the truth where being alone was not a punishment from God, but an opportunity to have a self- revelation, to experience that strength, within to enlighten herself in order to live, to create a newer version of herself when she had nothing, but only darkness ahead!
It would be utterly impossible for anyone to believe that she was going through that crisis of loneliness, on a very first meet with her. And my experience was also not exceptional to that. It was only through her own expressions during one of those casual chats that we occasionally used to have on some leisurely afternoons, I got to know how those days of loneliness had completely changed her vision and empowered her soul to flourish, within and helped her to evolve in a newer way in order to be aligned to her true purpose. Here I`m giving you some of her experiences that she shared with me on our last meet. On that day, quite in a way of releasing something that had been buried within herself for a long period of time, she shared those words with me. Those are still vivid in my memory;
“I accept that I`m lonely. And I’m thankful for that. And I`m also grateful that I`ve this loneliness around me. At least I`m not surrounded by those fake ones. But trust me, I`m not alone! I know, life mocks at me. Sometimes, sneers and howls at me. People scorn, calling me ` a helpless creature! ` But I`ve never complained, never tried to explain myself at anywhere. Instead, I always choose to be silent. As I know, I`m very much with myself and moreover have an eternal mate to talk with. At every night, I open my mail box, type something, some messages that only a thankful heart may express to her beloved and send those to my own mail. You may think that these all are such nonsense that I`m talking about. But trust me dear, I`ve been doing this, for quite a long time. And I`ve a deep belief in my heart that all my mails are getting received and downloaded by that eternal mate, guiding and protecting me, since a primordial time. And whenever I keep myself engaged in this task of sending those mails at my own mail box, I never feel that loneliness, that grief, inside. But always feel a higher level of consciousness, inspiring me to expand my vision to feel the calmness of that resting dove, sleeping within my entity, since eternity.”
She never took that loneliness as her failure, but took it as a spiritual quest and there in came an exploration, a self- reflection. And it was very much evident through her own speech. Instead of brooding over that loneliness, she preferred to use that period of solitude with all her grace and gratitude only to witness those wonderful miracles that were coming on her way. Do you want to know what exactly had happened to her? That loneliness ultimately channelized her intuition towards a different realm and inspired her to embark on a new journey to write a memoir of her own using all her wisdoms and experiences that she gained during that tough period of loneliness. And truly it helped her to emerge in a newer way, as an empowered soul who knows the true worth of her life, where being lonely doesn`t mean that someone is alone, rather it means that he/ she has some higher power, inside to connect to the entire universe and feel the divine magic, within even living in this tangible world of mundane reality. I know, you`re eager enough to have that information of what she used to write, opening her own mail box and send those to her own that ultimately leaded her to take up the decision of publishing her own memoir. I can only give you some of those messages and I feel that would be enough for you to perceive from where she got that strength not only to survive all alone in this world, but to contemplate and lead herself towards a newer meaning of existence. Some of her mails were like;
“Thanks for listening me, I know you care for me, you love me whoever I`m and whatever I`ve with me. I know, you loved me during those happy hours or those moments when I had nothing but only to confront those lonely towers! I know, you love me at those fearful nights when only the owl hoots and knows my plight or during those early morns when the birds leave their nests to have some extra grains. I know, you love me during those crowded mornings or during those lonely nights when I see no one, but only you to feel my plight!”
These were all the thankful messages that she used to send to her own mail box, at every night. Never think, that I`m also suggesting you to do that at every night, whenever you feel lonely. Because those were all her own personal manifestations, her personal belief to find her eternal mate by her side. But I must tell you whenever you feel those dark clouds of loneliness, trying to blur your vision, just have a deep faith, inside that you`re being watched over by some eternal energy, divine and magical. So nothing bad can harm you, as long as you`re connected to that universal intelligence. Wherever you go, whenever you feel lonely that divine intelligence will always be by your side as your soul mate or like that mate who is with you and will be forever, beyond these mundane hours of birth and death.
